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6 ways to avoid Night Thefts

September 8, 2012

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So recently a friend of mine got mugged and he was telling me all about it. I started to think about it, and my wild chain of thoughts led me to think that if a man breaks into my house, what precautions have i taken ? I started to think what precaution could i practically and realistically speaking, take ? My mind got engaged for the whole day and at the end of it, I finally summed up the best ideas i came up with :

1. Electrocute the boundary of the house including the gate.
Warning!
You may find a few carcasses of birds, dogs, beggars and relatives trying to surprise you at an ungodly hour, in the morning. Well they deserve it anyway.

2. Keep a firearm or a weapon of some sort (dagger is advised) nearby when you sleep.
Warning!
You may wake up stabbed or may not wake up at all !!!!!

3. Don’t sleep at night.
Suggestion!
A good horror movie might help, visit closest video shop for further assistance.

4. Hire an armed night guard.
Precaution!
Make sure he is financially stable and not greedy otherwise you are in a big trouble.

5. Build a big Fort.
Suggestion!
Rob a wealthy bank or find a connection in the government for financially affording the fort.

6. Become a Professional thief and be damn good at it.
Logic!
No one plays with ‘The Player’ 😉

If you guys come up with any ideas of the sort, please share…

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From → Humor, Politics

3 Comments
  1. Hahahaha!!!! Nice one, Usman.
    They were very apt points. (Winks)
    However, for #3, a smart thief like me would soon start robbing you even more easily in daylight, since he’d know your new sleeping habit.
    #5 -I think the bigger problem will be convincing the government you are not carrying out illegal operations behind your fort!

  2. Reblogged this on The Cat Man.

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